Mid Twenties Mutant Diva Turtle
You may know my cousins, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.... I am their second cousin twice removed, Mid Twenties Mutant Diva Turlte...
They eat pizza, I eat egg whites (gotta keep that girlish figure)
They spend their time saving the world with num chucks, I spend my time shopping and saving the world from fashion faux pauxs.
Their Ninja names are Leonardo, Donatello, Michael Angelo, and Raphael.... My Diva name is-- Cher.
They have a mutant rat named Splinter-- I have a mutant gay man named Scotty Pants.
Thats right, I have morphed into a turtle....
My shell being the covers on my bed....
Occasionally I will stick out a toe, or an arm, or on the rare occasion my head-- only to realize that the world is too cold, too bright, or too something....
And then I retreat into the warmth of my shell, also known as covers...
But I am in need of three more Diva Turtles, anyone care to join me?