Hello Good Sir... I know you are evil, we need not pretend. I Don't know if I have ever told this story before... But today, I am in the mood. (This story has not been altered to protect peoples identities, and facts have not been falsified. Yeah. It really happened.)

Once upon a time in a land called Fort Worth in the year 2001, there was this fair collegiate maiden named Ms. S'Ghetti. Ms. S'Ghetti had HORRID taste in men, and liked to date the likes of frat boys and bar flies. Especially if they had an enchanting accent or a fabulous last name. One day, she met someone who fit into all of her categories. He was a frat-boy-without-a-home, irish, barfly, with the last name of 'savage'. They flirted, they flirted more, and then he introduced her to his girlfriend. She didn't care, because nobody could rain on her parade. So she continued to flirt without touching until the girlfriend was turned into an evil rodent and skulked off into the night. Then she dated the barfly herself. One day, she was heading to his magical dorm room, when she encountered a note on the door. It said 'I've moved back to Ireland, I left this morning. I will miss you, but I know you hate goodbyes.' The fair maiden was PISSED. But, in typical fashion, she moved on, and flirted via email for many many years to come. Fast forward to now. The irish boy returned from his stint in the homeland, and has mercilessly tried to court the fair maiden, who has incedentally grown a brain in the last few years and will have nothing to do with him. He grew desperate, and had a friend leave a message on her voicemail feigning to be a suitor that met her the night before at a bar. The fair maiden has decided to climb upon her white horse with her trusty partner in crime and show up at the barflies haunt. Bad idea? Yes. Makes for a fantastic story? Absolutely.

So, if any of you care to see this tragedy unfold for themselves, you just say the word. It will happen tomorrow.  ¶ 9:17 PM