Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Pardon me while I bitch.... But you should be used to that.
**** Disclaimer: This post is a combination of my ability to fling truthballs of mass destruction, PMS, and general irritation. Anyone harmed by the words probably deserves it.****
Yesterday, my formerly favorite Canadian friend compared my blog to two day old pizza. He informed Elle that she had too much time on her hands as she is politically informed. He then made some rude retort to Robin.
Well, Styles. I think in all of this, you have misread your job description.
We, as in all females who read this blog, are fabulous. And if we are not fabulous, we should be treated as fabulous individuals all the same, as this is my blog and I make the rules.
Divas are pains in the ass, we need emotional stroking, tales of what makes us fabulous, and compliments. We do not need criticism, bitchiness, and general cattiness.
So, let me be the one to lay out your job description: You are the resident flirt. You flirt with anything equipped with two legs. You also compliment, compliment, compliment. You tell us how we do not deserve the horrible things that happen to us. You tell us we deserve all of the world's finest offerings. You encourage us to purchase ridiculous items such as large pieces of jewelry, Chanel anything, and Corture. You also defend us from the blog stalkers that find it to be an excellent idea to rain on our parade. YOU DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES tease, berate, or irritate.
Simple enough. When you find it in your heart to conform to these rules, you will again reign as my favorite canadian friend.
Sincerely,
Queenbitchheaddivaextrordinaire. ¶ 8:24 PM
Yesterday, my formerly favorite Canadian friend compared my blog to two day old pizza. He informed Elle that she had too much time on her hands as she is politically informed. He then made some rude retort to Robin.
Well, Styles. I think in all of this, you have misread your job description.
We, as in all females who read this blog, are fabulous. And if we are not fabulous, we should be treated as fabulous individuals all the same, as this is my blog and I make the rules.
Divas are pains in the ass, we need emotional stroking, tales of what makes us fabulous, and compliments. We do not need criticism, bitchiness, and general cattiness.
So, let me be the one to lay out your job description: You are the resident flirt. You flirt with anything equipped with two legs. You also compliment, compliment, compliment. You tell us how we do not deserve the horrible things that happen to us. You tell us we deserve all of the world's finest offerings. You encourage us to purchase ridiculous items such as large pieces of jewelry, Chanel anything, and Corture. You also defend us from the blog stalkers that find it to be an excellent idea to rain on our parade. YOU DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES tease, berate, or irritate.
Simple enough. When you find it in your heart to conform to these rules, you will again reign as my favorite canadian friend.
Sincerely,
Queenbitchheaddivaextrordinaire. ¶ 8:24 PM
