Sometimes I just need a little support. I know that I am the rock for most people in my life. I know that I don't really cry- and if I am crying it is generally best to step out of my tyranical path. I know that I don't show emotion in a manner most people see fit. I don't feel comfortable being weak, and so I put on the bravest face I can in all situations. I know all of this, and until recently I thought that the people closest to me understood that about me.

The funny thing about me is that I don't trust most people, I really don't. When I decide to trust someone, I invest in them. I give them all that I can, because I trust them, and I trust that they won't hurt me.

Yesterday, someone I have trusted since infancy hurt me. Hurt does not even begin to cover or convey my emotions. I feel like I lost a part of my heart, and my brain. On two occasions today, my eyes welled up with tears- and there I was, crying. Crying because one of those people who should never NEVER hurt me- shattered my feelings. Shattered my heart.

This person has been on a warpath with me lately. I am wrong because I say what I think, I am wrong because I don't support life decisions, I am wrong because I am 'Jaded.'

So how does said person decide to teach me a lesson? Stab me in the back, dispute my life choices, and make me more jaded.

Writing the title to this blog is something that is very diffifult for me to admit. I need support. I need help. I need to be loved.

I know that most of you people out in cyber land have no idea what is going on, or for that matter- what the hell I am talking about. But I guess I just needed to throw out a little 'Truthball of destruction' as
Scotty likes to call it.  ¶ 8:40 PM